A Pox On Your House

Whoever invented those stupid walkie takie cellphones should be placed in stocks and paraded about from city to city so that those of us with common sense can spit on him and riducule him mercilessly. In the time in which he is not on public display, he should be forced to listen to conversations being held on his devil's plaything.

Seriously, being subjected to loud cellphone conversations in public places was bad enough. Being subjected to both ends of it is worse. Add in the facts that a) the other end is good and static-y, and b)each switch in speaker is punctuated by that annoying little "BEEP", and you have a recipie for justifiable homicide. Please, someone tell me why this kind of a cellphone is necessary or even a good idea. I cannot come up with a single reason why anyone should own one of these. Unfortunately for me, this type of cellphone seems to be all the rage among the young "gangsta" types, at least judging by what I am subjected to on the bus on a regular basis.

One day, I swear, I'm going to hear that stupid "BEEP!" and I'll snap and start screaming like a banshee, frightening children and requiring the interference of armed police officers.