The Joys of Apartment Living

The woman who lives on the first floor of my building came home last night around midnight and proceeded to get into a screaming fight with her boyfriend in the hallway. It was obvious that she was very drunk. In fact, this is not the first time that she's treated the other tenants to a bout of drunk screaming in the halls, but usually it's her and her girlfriends traisping in and out to smoke on the stoop. They get locked out and instead of ringing her bell, they pound on the door until one of the other drunks notices them, then when they get let in, they have a 10 minute conversation (at the top of their lungs, because they're drunk and can't tell they're yelling) about how they can't believe they got locked out, giggle giggle.

Last night, however, she was NOT a happy drunk. She alternated between sobbing hysterically and screaming in fury, while the boyfriend argued back and tried to comfort her at the same time (also at the top of his lungs). The gist of the argument? He must have taken her to task in the car on the way home from wherever they'd been for getting drunk and dropping the f-bomb in front of his grandparents numerous times. She did not see this as a problem. Plus, HE MAKES HER FEEL SAD. She's NEVER been so MISERABLE as she is when she's with him. She doesn't LIKE him. It went on like this for maybe 20 minutes. Frankly, I was surprised that none of the other tenants had popped their heads out to say "Shut up!". I was busy trawling Craigslist for an apartment in Bethesda (no luck yet), so I couldn't be bothered at first. When I opened my door as a prelude to politely requesting them to take their domestic dispute behind closed doors, they went into her apartment and I couldn't hear them anymore.

I just came back from grocery shopping and there was a gigantic bouquet of yellow roses in front of her door.

Personally, I would have dumped her drunk butt, not sent her an "apology" of expensive flowers. Of course, we can never know what happens between another couple, so maybe my judgment is a little too hasty. But I am here to tell you: when your girlfriend repeatedly gets stupid drunk and doesn't see that there's a problem with dropping the f-bomb in front of your grandparents at what sounded like some posh family gathering (like an anniversary party or a wedding reception, I couldn't tell which), then tells you that YOU AREN'T EVEN A NICE MAN, that's your sign to re-evaluate your relationship and its future.

I can't wait to own my own home.