Were You Raised In A Barn?

There are some people at Our Law School who I suspect of having an extra chromosome or two. Or perhaps they’re missing a couple, I don’t know. I’m just looking around the lunchroom and I’m here to tell you, not everyone here acts like they were part of one of the most selective group of applicants to be accepted at the school. They sure as heck don’t act like students at a first tier law school. So, here are a few tips:
- Don’t chew with your mouth open. There are maybe a hundred other people eating lunch here and I would wager that NOT ONE of them wants to see your lunch being masticated.
- If you walk through a door immediately before someone else, HOLD THE DOOR for them.
- The stairwells here are very narrow. Don’t try to walk up or down them two (or three) abreast, especially during the between class rush. You’re gumming up the works.
- It’s a library, not a social club. Be quiet. If you can’t be quiet, go outside.
- Flush the toilets. Don’t make me tell you again.
- If, when your class ends, the students from the next class come in and are waiting for your seat, that is not your cue to sit and have a leisurely chat. Pack your stuff and go. There are only ten minutes between classes and your professor already stole 3 or 4 of them from all of us by starting late. Many of us would like to put our stuff down and go to the bathroom before class begins. Others would simply like to have time to sit down, set up the laptop, and find their place in the case book before the lecture begins.
- Try, hard though it might be, to say “excuse me” if you bowl into someone in your rush to get to the refrigerator.
- Oh, and by the way, your momma don’t work here, so clean up after yourself, mkay?