Saturday, March 21, 2009

More Language Pedantry

Each Sunday, some adult in the congregation is chosen to lead a short lesson for the little kids, who get to run down to the front of the church and sit in the front pews during the "Children's Message". The sheer energy released during the run down the aisle could power the church for most of the week, and it is insanely adorable most of the time. Anyway, some of the speakers are better than others, and there's one in particular who is downright awful. On Sundays when she calls the kids down for the Children's Message, the kids don't so much run down the aisle as they meander. On this particular Sunday, she wants to talk about hypocrites for some bizarre reason, and because she is showing unusual foresight and understanding of the age level involved, she tries to use an example to show what the big word means. It would seem that the Sunday School classes are taking up a collection to go to help in rebuilding in New Orleans. In her universe, the children would be hypocrites if they kept the collection money to buy candy.

Here's a hint: if you tell people you are collecting for hurricane victims, but then you keep the money for yourself, you're a liar and a thief, but you're not really a hypocrite. In order to be a hypocrite, you would also have to spend a lot of time decrying people who scam others out of money by collecting for "charity" and keeping the money for themselves.


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