More Changes

Hulio got a new job. She’s leaving me to move back to our hometown in six weeks.

Ash asked me how I felt about it and I didn’t quite know how to explain it. Hulio’s wanted out of her current job for a long time and she’s not particularly happy living here, anyway, plus I know she’d like to be able to spend more time with her nieces and nephews, who all live back in our hometown. The new job, though not exactly her dream job, is definitely a step up for her, and it should enable her to move up within the company in the future. So I’m really happy and excited for her.

But I’m really sad for me. I like being able to show up unannounced, knock on her window, and propose a trip to Target. I like the fact that our long, long, long talks are a local call. I like being able to go see Patty Griffin together every time she comes to town. I like just knowing that she’s there. Who am I going to give my spare keys to? Who is going to stand in the IKEA parking lot with me, figuring out a way to fit a very large dresser into the trunk of a Toyota Corolla?

Hulio thinks that this might be the last time we ever live in the same city. I don’t know if that’s right: Lord knows, I never thought I’d live in Buffalo, yet... If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the past year, it’s that you never know what might happen or where you might end up. Besides, I’ll need a roommate when I finally land a job in some exotic location:

Ring ring!

“Hello?”

“Hey.”

“Hey. What’s up?”

“Nothing. What’s up with you?”

“Nothing. Wanna move to Toronto/Paris/Uruguay with me?”

"OK."

Besides, I also know that it doesn’t make a lick of difference where we live. Who else is there that can crack me up just by saying certain words?

“Bob.”

“Bob!”

“Bob. Socks.”

“Bobsocks.”

She knows all of my dirty secrets, has seen me at my worst, and calls me out when I’m being ridiculous. She also knows all of my secret hopes and dreams, helps me be my best, and encourages me when I feel doomed to fail. We get each other into trouble and help each other out of trouble. Over the years we’ve developed our own way of communicating, a language of our own that feels completely natural to us, but often mystifies everyone else (“Toward me or toward you?”). Distance is nothing in the face of that.

So, I suppose the answer to Ash’s question is: I’m so happy and not at all sad. I mean, I’m probably 98% happy and 2% sad. And I mean, what's 2%? That's nothing. Okay, I'm 90/10. Totally.